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Warning Note: Since this is unfinished and going to stay that way, it's also unbetaed, and barely even proof read by yours truly. Read on at your own risk.

The following comments were written contemporaneously with the story and remain for posterity.

Disclaimer: Renpics owns it all. I own nada. Next question?

WARNING: Okay, folks the harsh reality is I've been increasingly disgusted with both the character Xena (note: this was originally written shortly after the conclusion of season 5). She's become a self righteous, all knowing, arrogant, abusive, manipulative, murderous prig, who apparently can kill anyone at anytime and still do no wrong, culminating in her most recent murderous rampage against Gabrielle and the Greek Gods, all in the interests of protecting her dear little slaughtering, blood-drinking brat. Now, bearing in mind what I've just written, if you just love Xena, think she's the greatest and truly can do no wrong, please, for all our sakes, just go read a different story. Really. Xena is not the hero here. I'm not writing this to piss you off or start an argument. I'm writing it for my own cathartic reasons and it will just make your blood pressure rise. Then you'll get mad and write me nasty things, and make my blood pressure rise. And no fun will be had. So, really, I mean it, IF THIS IS GOING TO BUG YOU, DON'T READ IT. And if you do read it, don't blame me if you get pissed off. I warned you.

DARKEST BEFORE THE DAWN  Part 2                                                
by Blaze

The long Northern twilight was sliding slowly into darkness. It would probably be another month before total darkness had overtaken the sky, but already she could see the faint flicker of stars gleaming against the soft grey backdrop, the distinctive arrangement of the constellations just barely visible. It was this sight the Goddess of Love stood silently watching, immune to the snow that dusted across her bare feet and wind that blew across the snowy savannah. Occasionally, she took a sip from the glass in her hand as she ruminated on her thoughts, but otherwise, she simply stood and watched and thought. With everything that had happened, it was hardly logical that she could think of little but the kisses she'd shared with Gabrielle. She really had just meant to help, but then the bard had been so sweet, so hurt, and so scared, and that first kiss had just happened; unplanned, maybe even unwanted, certainly unexpected for both of them. And that second kiss... pure irresistible temptation.

In a flash, she knew why she'd aided the bard against her own family and interests.

It was almost comical for the Goddess of Love to be so blind when it came to her own emotions. She drained the last of her drink, feeling the bite of liquor mixed with ambrosia on her throat. For once, she wished she could get drunk. Maybe if she was blind drunk something would make sense.

She was still musing on the whole sorry situation and didn't bother to turn as she sensed another figure's entrance into her private domain.

"Cupid," the goddess said softly.

"Hey, Mom," her son said with a cheerful toss of his blond hair. He was sitting cross legged in mid-air, his wings draping gracefully down his back, the long tips just barely dusting the top of the snow. He looked around himself, one pale brow rising high on his forehead. "Now, this is interesting. I haven't seen you retreat to this place, since--"

"I really don't want to discuss this," she said before he could continue and his already raised eyebrows lifted another notch. His mother almost never forbade any subject--it was one of her trademarks-- and he couldn't help but wonder at the cause of the sudden freeze out. Actually, in truth, he had a pretty good idea, but he'd been expecting confirmation to be pretty easy. But judging by the chill emanating from more than just the surrounding glaciers, that wasn't the case. Clearly, he was going to have to come at this little problem from a whole new angle.

"So how's Gabrielle doing?" he asked, sounding entirely too interested in her answer for the goddess' comfort. She knew just how charismatic her son could be when he wanted to.

Aphrodite looked back to spear him with a pointed look. "Fine," she answered without elaborating. "How did you know she was here?" she added, chewing worriedly on her lower lip.

He waved off her fears. "Don't worry. I've been keeping track of things. Everyone else is too involved in their own gigs to do that, so you're okay."

"Good." Aphrodite let out a sigh of relief that her son's sharp eyes didn't miss. With everything screwed up the way it was, he supposed he should have had other worries, but he'd made sure his family was safe, and past that...well, worrying wasn't really his strong suit.

He quirked an eyebrow and offered his best leering look. "Maybe I should go check on her."

"Don't!" Aphrodite said too quickly, then caught herself with a more measured, if entirely too nervous, "I mean...she's asleep. Don't wake her."

Cupid shrugged and offered a devilish grin. "Don't worry, I won't bother her," he assured his mother with a broad wink. He appeared to consider his own words. "Of course," he drawled knowingly, "that does give me a lot of room to maneuver."

Aphrodite spun all the way around, staring at her son with wide-eyed disapproval. "And exactly what is that supposed to mean?" she demanded disapprovingly.

He shrugged and offered a rakish smile accompanied by a waggle of his eyebrows. "Well, she is a very attractive girl...and I am the Messenger of Love."

"The very married Messenger of Love," Aphrodite reminded him sharply.

Cupid only kept grinning, refusing to be intimidated by his mother's outrage. "When did that ever stop anyone in this family?" he needled, his grin broadening a notch when he saw her spine stiffen. Oh, this was definitely turning out to be an interesting discussion.

"I don't think you really want to know how badly Psyche would hurt you if you seriously thought about doing such a thing," she informed him.

"What she doesn't know won't--"

"Oh, I'd tell her," Aphrodite threatened with a saccharine smile.

Cupid stared at his mother for a long moment, noting the tension rippling through her muscles, and the almost aggressive stance she adopted as she glared at him. He couldn't keep up the act any longer and broke out into laughter, which only made her angrier. "Oh, you've got it bad," he chuckled triumphantly and saw her stiffen.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she denied instantly.

Cupid just laughed, enjoying her discomfiture. "Oh, come on, Mom. It's obvious." He waggled his brows suggestively. "You've got a thing for the little bard."

"It's really not that simple," the goddess insisted without actually denying the charge, though it bothered her to think that he'd apparently known before she had.

Cupid unfolded his legs and landed lightly. "Hey, I think it's great." He sobered momentarily. "Look, if this is about dad...I mean, I know you two hadn't been what you'd call a couple in centuries--"

"It's not about that," the goddess sighed, though if she was honest with herself, that was some of her discomfort with the whole thing. She'd barely a chance to mourn for Hephaestus, but with the situation as desperate as it was, there just wasn't time. Their marriage might have been over for all intents and purposes, but he'd been her husband, her child's father, and a decent person. He deserved to be mourned by someone.

"She's still got it for Xena, huh?" Cupid muttered unhappily. For obvious reasons, the warrior princess wasn't among his favorite people in the world, but he liked the bard. Always had. She had a good heart...and an even better body. Then he grinned as he remembered just who he was. "Hey, I can take care of that easily enough." He mimed firing a bow. "Ping. Problem solved."

Her expression darkened. "No."

His brows lifted and he looked disappointed. "But it's my job...at least for the moment..." His tone became petulant. "At least until Xena's One God takes over and bores the planet into submission." He quirked a look at his mother. "Which doesn't explain why you don't want me to...." He trailed off, staring at her consideringly. She turned away under his close scrutiny, but he simply unfolded his legs and dropped lightly to the snow, pacing around her until they were face to face again. "I don't believe it," he murmured in an awed voice.

Aphrodite turned away again, but he only followed, refusing to let her escape.

"This isn't just friendly lust--"

"Cupid," the goddess whispered on a warning note.

"You went and fell in love." He shook his head and laughed softly in disbelief. "The Goddess of Love finally went and sampled her own wares."

She snorted dismissively, though there was a certain lack of sincerity to the gesture. "You talk like you think I've never been in love."

"You haven't," he son said firmly. "Take it from someone who has been. Oh, you've done lust--we're good at that--and like, and affection, and fondness, and even a fairly successful combination of all of the above. But you haven't done love. Take it from me. I know the difference these days." He thought about this new discovery for a moment and decided he approved. "So maybe it's time. I can give you a little help, y'know." He mimed shooting his bow again and grinned as he reminded her. "Ping."

"No," Aphrodite said firmly.

"But, Mom--"

"No." Her tone brooked absolutely no argument and he slumped in defeat.

Cupid's mouth compressed in a disapproving line. "You're going to do this the hard way, aren't you?"

Aphrodite shrugged. "If I do it at all." She tipped her head back on her shoulders, staring skyward as if there might be answers to her thoughts in the stars. "With Xena running around with the power to kill gods, the situation isn't what you'd call ideal."

Cupid shrugged. "Maybe that makes it more important." He considered the situation a moment longer before continuing with something less than his usual enthusiasm. "Though I have to admit, you could have chosen somewhat...more...conservatively...than the main squeeze of the woman who's currently trying to kill us all." Then he did an about face and laughed again. "Of course, that's how love is." At his mother's frown, he clarified his meaning. "It's never easy, or conservative, or even remotely practical. You of all people should know that." He clearly found the whole situation hilariously funny which was beginning to grate on Aphrodite's nerves.

"I'm glad you're enjoying this so much," she exhaled disgustedly.

"Oh, I am," he admitted. "I guess it's the poetic justice of the thing."

"And will it be poetic justice when Xena cuts off my head?" Aphrodite asked as she folded her arms across her ample chest.

Cupid screwed up his features in a gagging expression. "Ugh, gross...she wouldn't actually do that, would she?"

Aphrodite didn't comment, just flashed an arch look his way.

"Ooo," a pained look flashed across his face, "you're right, she would." He considered the problem for a moment, head tilted to one side, expression intent as he put every ounce of available brainpower to the task. "I could unping her," he said at last, bright-eyed at the discovery.

Aphrodite waved the suggestion off. "I think it would be redundant at this point. It's obsession, not love...you and I can't undo that...she and Ares go well together."

Cupid's mouth twisted into an evil grin at the last words. "I know," he drawled, stretching the words out and giving them a triumphant spin.

His mother refocused on him, eyes narrowing suspiciously. "You have that look," she diagnosed accurately. "What have you done?"

"Me...what...oh...nothing," he insisted none too believably.

Aphrodite glared. She knew her son too well to believe that. "Spill it."

Cupid was sweating now. "It was really...it was nothing...just a little tiny...almost a dart really...wouldn't be fair to call it an arrow--"

"Who?" Aphrodite demanded angrily.

"Ares," Cupid answered, his voice cracking mid-word.

Aphrodite paled several shades. "What have you done?" she groaned.

He shrugged helplessly. "Well, I never thought...I mean, I figured he'd save Gabrielle to please Xena. It never occurred to me he'd save Eve too. I thought self-preservation alone would prevent that," he added the last on a mutter.

Aphrodite could only stare wide-eyed at her son, though she considered materializing a couch onto the snow plain so she could collapse onto it. "Why on earth would you have done such a thing?"

He shrugged, looking away as he answered. "Hey, I figured out you like the girl...how many other mortals do you hang out with? I mean you spent the two and a half decades you thought she was dead moping around like...well...like someone had run over your best friend. I couldn't heal her, and I figured Ares was just thick enough..." Another shrug. "I kinda planted a little suggestion while I was at it. A healthy dose of lust, plus... Y'know, a touch of selfless love in the mix...the suggestion of a payoff if he helped Xena out...." He looked up surprised a short beat later when he heard the totally unexpected sound of his mother's laughter. "Um...Mom?"

"I should have known," she murmured between chuckles that were only slightly hysterical. "Ares being unselfish...what are the chances of that?" She shook her head as she absorbed what he'd told her. "I should totally strangle you."

Cupid hung his head.

"Technically speaking, you have not helped the situation."

Cupid rubbed a toe in the snow, drawing idle patterns, and risked a brief glance up through his bangs where they hung across his forehead as he reminded himself to use more mousse the next time he did his hair. Thank God, the Gods had mousse, even if mortals weren't destined to invent the stuff for several millennia yet. He wasn't sure he could have gotten through all this insanity without it.

The goddess' stern expression was softened by a wry smile. "But as awful as this whole mess is, I can't regret that she's alive." She gnawed on her lower lip. "If only Athena and the others had backed off and thought it through. I thought Xena was ready to make a truce. That's why I took them to Olympus."

"Prophecy, Mom," Cupid pointed out logically. "If it hadn't happened that way, it would have happened some other way."

"You're sounding awfully calm about the thing," Aphrodite noted curiously.

Another shrug. When cornered, Cupid was a champion shrugger.

"Out with it," his mother commanded, using the same tone she'd used when he was a mere babe of a hundred and fifty.

He looked up, beginning hesitantly, "Well, I've been giving it some thought, and maybe there's a way around this whole prophecy thing."

"And...."

"Give up godhood. Never been all that married to it anyway. Mortality might suck, but it beats," he dragged the edge of one hand across his throat, "decapitation, fire, flood, and whatever other forms of death Xena can think up...and I'm relatively confident she's pretty clever on that front."

She just stared at him for a long moment. It was an idea that had never occurred to her--conceptually, not even something she could really envision. She'd been born into godhood, and had never considered any other existence. In some respects, the challenges seemed terrifyingly insurmountable.

"I figure I'm a reasonably smart, personable guy. I can figure a way to make ends meet and feed the family if I've gotta do the mortal thing." His hands fisted at his sides and for the first time, the careless bravado slipped a notch. He'd seen dozens of petty grievances escalate into wars within the reigning gods of Olympus, seen death come and go among both mortals and gods, but this time he was truly scared. For once, simply lying low, being charming, and refusing to take sides might not be enough to ensure survival for him or his family. "I'd do anything before I'd let Xena and her One True God near my son."

Aphrodite studied her son carefully, seeing the man he'd become for the first time. Like her, he wasn't someone who'd ever been given much respect in the halls of Olympus, but in that instant, she was unbelievably proud of him. She reached out, fondly brushing unruly hair off his brow the way she had when he was a child. "We'll figure out a way through this," she promised quietly.

He nodded and even managed a rakish grin, though it was forced. "Hey, you and I've always been a team." Then mother and son hugged hard, holding tight as if for the last time, which was suddenly a possibility in their lives. "Nothing changes that, even if we've added a few more players."

She nodded, petting his hair back from his forehead as they both pulled back a notch. "You be careful and lie low. Don't trust anyone. With luck, the worst is already over and things will just die down...but, just in case...."

"You be careful too. You're more likely to be in her sights than I am." He stretched his wings out behind him, rippling them gracefully. "And remember, you take care of the little bard...and take care of yourself while you're at it. I'm fond of her, but I love you." They hugged again and then she nodded

"Now off you go. You've a family to see to, and I expect nothing but the best for my grandson."

"Way kewl," he said with a grin, then winked out.

"Oh my, that son 'o mine," Aphrodite exhaled, and then she too disappeared in a flash of lights.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *~ *

And then a voice washed through her like the gentlest of sea breezes. "Shhh, it's all right. You're safe now."

"No," her sea breeze protector assured her, and then new hands caught her, soft and gentle now, though firm enough to hold her as they curved to her upper arms. "They can't get past my wards."

Gabrielle's eyes snapped open as she fought free of the dreamscape to find herself staring into sea blue eyes, not pale like Xena's, but deeper and more violet, the color stormy and turbulent. "Aphrodite," she gasped as she stared up at the goddess. "Furies," she repeated weakly, nearly out of breath in the aftermath of the nightmare.

"It was only a nightmare," the goddess assured her, though she maintained a gentle grip on the bard's shoulders.

"It was so real," Gabrielle breathed, her heart still hammering in her chest.

A tender hand petted her hair soothingly. "The Furies can't enter here...through dreams or doors...." She sighed softly. "And anyway, now that Athena and the others..." she trailed off, unable to finish the sentence. A second later, she began again. "They have no reason to bother you now." Hurt flickered in her eyes, then was masked as she refocused on Gabrielle. "You're safe here."

Gabrielle slowly pushed up amid the pillows, leaning on one hand as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes with the other. "I hope you know," she whispered, "how sorry I am for your loss...losses...." She reached out to cover Aphrodite's hand with her own. "None of this should have happened." Her look became distant as she remembered everything that had been lost for all of them. "I can't believe Eli's god would be so cruel."

Aphrodite nodded. It didn't make any sense to her either. Supposedly Eli's god was one of love. No one on Olympus had done anything to his followers--unlike the Romans--yet he seemed to be bent on their death and destruction. "Cupid's afraid for his family and I can't say I blame him." The goddess sounded tired and introspective in a way that Gabrielle had never heard from her before. She sat back on the neighboring mattress, then flopped back, folding one arm over her eyes as she mused out loud, "What kind of god denies his followers any protection, but hunts down other gods?" It didn't make any sense. Even Ares -- probably the least caring of the Olympian gods -- rewarded his followers, yet Eli's gods seemed not to care for their welfare. And, despite claiming to be a god of love, his heralds were a semi-recovering mass murderer and her equally violent daughter. The mind boggled at how that could possibly be considered more loving than her priestesses who opened the temples to travelers and the poor, and spent their time in rites of sexual healing during the high holy days. "I mean, I can't even kill bugs."

"I don't know," the bard answered honestly, feeling genuine pity for the goddess. She seemed so lost. She folded her legs under her, silently watching Aphrodite for a long moment before speaking up carefully. "Can I ask you a question?"

The goddess lifted the arm draped across her eyes to peer curiously at the bard. "Anything."

Gabrielle took a deep breath, let it out slowly to calm her jangled nerves, then quietly asked, "Why are you helping me?"

Aphrodite frowned in momentary confusion as if deciding how to answer the question. She pushed into a sitting position, looking decidedly ungoddesslike as she fumbled with the gauzy grey peignoir that revealed more than it covered. "While you were gone," she began hesitantly. "While we thought you were dead...I missed you." She fiddled with the ornate gold bracelet that encircled her wrist, studying it as though she'd never seen it before as she continued, "We'd had fun. I liked you.... You weren't all scared and subservient like most mortals or haughty and dismissive like the other gods." She sighed softly, her breath ruffling the soft bangs that fell across her eyes. "Hercules always said I needed a friend." She looked up then, meeting Gabrielle's watching eyes. "And I guess I felt you were my friend." Amazingly enough, the goddess sounded hesitant as though she fully expected the gesture to be rejected.

"You are a friend," Gabrielle confirmed, smiling in fond memory as she remembered some of the times she'd spent in the company of the other woman. Normal wasn't the word to describe any of the experiences, but they'd been fun in their way, and she couldn't deny she'd mostly enjoyed herself. Her mind flashed to the kisses they'd shared in the glade and on the trail, and she felt her skin heat with an embarrassed blush even as guilt coiled in the pit of her stomach. Enjoy was far too mild a word for those two experiences--so passionate and heated that the mere memory had the power to make her tremble--but she wasn't ready to take her feelings out and analyze them. Not yet at least. "But I'm not exactly sure...what...else..." she trailed off, not knowing how to express the questions that were more feelings that articulated thoughts.

Aphrodite looked at the bard, her expression more serious than Gabrielle was used to, then glanced around, doublechecking to making certain Cupid wasn't lurking in any dark corners, ready to add his two cents to the outcome of the conversation. She knew her son well enough to be quite certain he'd merrily hurry things along if he got half a chance. "I don't know either," she sighed as her eyes came back to the nervously waiting bard. She smiled wryly. "These things are so much easier when it's someone else's life." She leaned on one hand, angling toward the bard, her expression ringing with longing despite her best efforts.

Gabrielle stared at the goddess, feeling the hot burn of knowledge and desire coil alongside the guilt in the pit of her stomach. She could deny that she felt something, but it was too new and her emotions already too jumbled over the situation with Xena. Acting on impulse seemed foolish at best. But from what she knew of the gods, they weren't much inclined to wait and they usually expected payment for favors done. Aphrodite hadn't seemed like she was hinting in that direction, and she had always seemed so different from the others, but was she that different?

"I'm not ready," the bard said very softly. "I...just...." She shook her head, trailing off helplessly, not even close to being able to express what she was feeling.

"I know that," Aphrodite whispered before adding quietly, "I don't know that I am either." She reached out, intending to trail her fingers along Gabrielle's cheek, but the bard pulled back just before she made contact. The goddess frowned in momentary confusion, then knowledge entered her eyes. She knew what the other gods were like, the ways they took advantage of mortals, the seductive games played for pure sport. She'd even indulged in a few liaisons of her own over the span of her life, but never with the raw trickery that seemed to dominate Ares' and Zeus' romantic techniques. She shook her head in denial. "There aren't any strings attached to my help. No expectations. No requirements." Her gaze hardened. "I'm not Ares."

Gabrielle exhaled heavily as she recognized the hurt in the other woman's suddenly flinty gaze. "I'm sorry...I didn't think that...I just...." She dropped her gaze to her interlaced fingers. "I-I know you wouldn't do that." She was still waiting for the goddess to respond when her stomach chose that inopportune moment to remind her how long it had been since she'd eaten. The low growl echoed embarrassingly loudly.

Aphrodite raised a brow, then suddenly grinned, the serious mood broken. Seriousness wasn't really her bag anyway. "Actually, now that I think about it, there is a price," she decided, abruptly, her tone grave.

The bard looked startled. "What?" she croaked, wondering at her own sanity for thinking one of the gods would help without asking for something in return.

The goddess grinned, showing even white teeth. "Dinner."

"Dinner?" Gabrielle repeated, not entirely certain she'd heard correctly.

"Dinner," Aphrodite confirmed as Gabrielle's stomach made its views on the matter known again. "You sound like you could use it." Her eyes glinted teasingly.

Gabrielle's stomach growled again, and this time even the bard had to grin at the ridiculousness of the situation. "Well," she murmured after a beat, appearing to consider the price. "I guess...since I do owe you...."

Laughing softly, the goddess pushed to her feet, then reached back to catch the bard's hand in her own and tug her to feet. Still hand in hand, the goddess pivoted, gesturing with her free hand. Tables of food worthy of any king's banquet appeared in a moving trail of light.

Gabrielle's jaw dropped. Used to the usually spartan supplies available on the trail with Xena, she could only stare.

Aphrodite grinned as she noted the expression on the bard's face. "Then this'll do?" she questioned through a laugh.

Still wide-eyed, Gabrielle nodded. "Oh yeah."

Again, the goddess laughed, the sweet sound sending a ripple of awareness down Gabrielle's spine. By the gods, the woman's laughter should be outlawed for indecency, the bard thought as it occurred to her that the lack of pressure was twice as seductive as a hard sell would have been.

"Try some of this...and this...and this..." Aphrodite said merrily as she broke away from the bard to begin piling a plate high with things for the bard to sample.

As difficult as the situation was, Gabrielle found herself swept away by the goddess' infectious good humor. As if by tacit agreement, they discussed nothing serious over the rambling meal, instead trading jokes, silly stories, heroic tales, and oddball anecdotes, purposely making each other laugh and smile. It was the most pleasant time Gabrielle could remember spending in ages.

Afterward, the bard moved to stare out at surreal landscape that surrounded the temple on three sides. Fascinated, she watched snow blow across the flat plane, moving like sand dunes in the Sahara. "Where are we?" she questioned. "Is it a real place? I mean--on Earth--or something else...like Olympus?"

Aphrodite came up behind her, not bothering to point out that to the gods, Olympus was as real a place as any other as she leaned close to murmur, "It's real."

"The sky," the bard breathed, awed by the stark beauty laid before her. "I've never seen anything like it...where's the sky that color for hours on end?"

"North..." Aphrodite answered, her gaze following the bard's as she continued, "North of everywhere. And it's not just like that for hours on end. It takes weeks for the days to pass here. Soon it'll be completely dark, and it will stay that way for months. Pretty cool, huh?"

"It's amazing."

Aphrodite nodded, watching the sky with an expression of awe equal to the mortal's. "Just wait till you see the Northern Lights. The whole sky lights up. Now that's a show."

Gabrielle didn't ask if she would be there to see it. For the moment at least, she was taking things one day at a time. Instead, she just relaxed, listening to the comforting warmth of the goddess' voice, content to simply enjoy herself.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *~ *

With nearly a week gone looking for Gabrielle, Ares was seriously beginning to doubt the wisdom of his recent choices. He was bruised, battered, and bone tired, his inner thighs chafed and abraded from days on end in the saddle, his back wrenched from sleeping on hard, cold ground, and his nose and throat raw from the dust kicked up on the trail. Mortality had nothing to recommend it as far as he was concerned. Even sex with Xena had turned into a chore. Oh, she was a volcanic lover, too much so in fact for his newly mortal body. Where once any blow she could have delivered would have been meaningless, now every encounter left him with a fresh layer of bruises. At first, he'd been confident Xena would realize she was in love with him, then fall into line and be the appropriately worshipful acolyte he wanted. After all, how could she resist his obvious charms?

But resist she had. In fact, when not using his body for her own pleasure, she was consistently dismissive, almost aggressively derisive, making it plain all the while that she loathed him. If he weren't the one on the receiving end of her attentions, he would have enjoyed the spectacle, even been turned on by it. As it was, he couldn't help but curse the fates that had screwed up every one of his plans while privately berating himself for his obsession with the warrior princess in the first place. Nothing had gone the way it was supposed to where she was concerned.

"Damn my soft heart," he muttered furiously, thinking how he should have just let the blond and the brat die. So Athena would have killed Xena; with Hades dead, he probably could have made a deal to get her out of Tartarus, and she'd have had to be grateful then. And as he still would have been a god, he might have had a fighting chance of actually enjoying her gratitude. "But no," he jeered himself as he struggled to ignore the parts of his body throbbing in time with the creaking of his saddle. "You just had to go and be honorable." And speaking of things with nothing to recommend them....

"Here," Xena's clipped command snapped him out of his private musings as she pulled her horse up short and threw a leg over the animal's neck to drop lightly to the ground. Despite himself, Ares couldn't keep his eyes off the obscene length of well muscled leg visible as she moved.

They were in a small clearing, only a few yards from a pleasant little house the sort of which Ares once wouldn't have been caught dead near. His expression turned to a sneer as he recognized the broad shouldered figure chopping wood in the side yard. He straightened as he saw the newcomers, though Ares noted he kept the ax in hand.

"Hercules," Xena said sharply as she drew near her former enemy and colleague. She too noticed the way he kept hold of the ax.

The demi-god nodded, casting a suspicious gaze on the warrior princess' traveling companions. "Xena." He sounded cautious, but not hostile, like he'd heard rumors and wasn't sure how much stock to put in them. "I heard you'd reappeared," he said softly, eyeing her carefully. "You seem to be doing well."

She shrugged. "For someone who spent twenty-five years more or less dead," she allowed, then changed subjects. "You're looking good." Half god, he hadn't changed at all.

He only shrugged. A long moment passed before he quietly questioned, "Why are you here, Xena?" He knew about the slaughter on Mt. Olympus, and coupled with Xena's apparent destiny to do away with the gods to make way for Eli's god, he couldn't help but wonder if his time had come. After all, he was Zeus' son, and though he'd helped deliver Eve into the world, if Xena had decided to finish off the Olympians, she might well have added his name to the list of those scheduled to die in the name of her "God of Love."

"I came because I need your help," the warrior princess told him without missing a beat.

Hercules frowned. "My help?"

"Gabrielle's been kidnapped...I think one of the gods was involved."

It was on the tip of Hercules' tongue to ask who she'd left alive to do the job, but he restrained the urge. Besides Gabrielle was someone he considered a friend. He liked the pretty blond. She was sweet, kind, and she'd done a lot to keep Xena's more venomous instincts in check. He wasn't comfortable to find Xena in his half-brother's company, but, knowing his family, they'd likely had as much to do with forcing the confrontation as the warrior princess. "Why don't you start at the beginning," he suggested after a beat, willing to at least hear her out.

Ares climbed down from his mount, listening with one ear as he stretched out tortured muscles. Under his half brother's questioning Xena gave her version of event from the confrontation on the beach forward, though he noted she left out a fair number of details. He wondered if Hercules guessed what at least one of them was when his half brother threw an assessing gaze his way, though the demi-god made no comment.

As Xena finished, Hercules looked over at Eve who'd finally climbed down from her horse when motioned to do so by her mother. Seemingly regressed to a state of total infancy since her supposed conversion and baptism by Eli's god, she only seemed to act at her mother's prodding, leaving Ares to wonder what he'd been thinking in bedding that one.

Hercules shook his head slowly. "I'm sorry, I haven't heard anything...but...." He considered the problem for a short moment. "I can ask around...see if anyone knows anything." His eyes flickered over to Ares. "I still have a few friends who might know what's going on."

"Thank you." Xena heaved a relieved sigh, then moved as if to grab her saddlebag. "We can spend the night, then start looking tomorrow." Her eyes glinted with dangerous lights that promised retribution for whoever had stolen Gabrielle. She would bring the bard back, and leave whoever had dared touch her in a bloody puddle.

"You can't stay," Hercules informed her, his tone firm.

Xena pivoted back. "Excuse me?" she drawled, her hand dropping automatically to the chakram on her hip. "If you think I'm just going to walk away--"

"They won't talk to me if you're here." Hercules straightened his shoulders, braced for anything that might come. The fact that he'd agreed to try and help didn't mean that he necessarily trusted her completely. After all, he of all people knew what she'd been, and who her traveling companions were now.

Xena's lips pulled back from her teeth in a feral snarl. "Oh, they'll talk."

Hercules' eyes narrowed, but he ignored the jibe, instead nodding toward Eve. "That's your daughter?"

"That's right." Aggressive suspicion threaded through the warrior princess' voice. She knew Hercules tendency toward wholesomeness. He wouldn't understand someone like Eve, wouldn't understand the circumstances that had forced her to do the things she'd done, or that she'd already been purified of her crimes. If he was a threat....

"I've heard of Livia, the Terror of Rome." He shook his head in disgust, while Xena's fingers wrapped loosely around her chakram. If he could be of use to her, fine, but if he planned on threatening her daughter in any way, their friendship wouldn't save him. After all, his bloodline was only half from the gods, and they'd died easily enough.

"She's changed."

"I hope so," Hercules said softly without openly calling Xena a liar. "You'll still have to leave," he repeated. "Or I can't help you."

"If they have Gabrielle, it's my business."

"I'll find you if I learn anything." He faced her sneering anger calmly, his expression giving nothing away. "But none of the gods will talk to me if you're here and," he nodded toward Eve, "she's already ridden through this area...the body count was high, and I doubt any of the locals will be terribly welcoming."

Again Xena's face twisted in a sneer that Hercules remembered better from her warlord days than the time when she'd been trying to redeem her soul. "If they want trouble, I can give it to them," she promised.

"That's why I want you gone." Hercules folded his arms across his chest, forming a solid barricade. "There's already been enough innocent blood spilled and I have no intention of allowing any more."

"If they don't cause any trouble, there won't be."

It was Ares who tried to mediate some measure of peace, half afraid Xena would lose him his newly mortal life before he'd even had a chance to break it in. "Maybe a fighting the entire county's not the best way of dealing with this," he suggested. "You know, little brother Herc here. He's as honest as the day is long and not about to lie to you. If he finds blondie, I have no doubt he'll do the honorable thing."

"He'd better," the warrior princess snarled, making the words a threat as she glared at Hercules, clearly not happy with the situation, but knowing Ares had a good point. "All right then," she allowed uncharitably at last. "We'll keep moving, but I suggest you find whoever has her," the snarl was back in place, "before I do if you want to keep the blood from running."

Hercules didn't respond, simply watched as the trio mounted and kept moving on down the road. When he was satisfied they were gone, he turned and moved inside the small cabin.

"That looked nasty," a familiar voice commented dryly.

Hercules turned to look at Iolaus--nearing seventy now, his friend was still a handsome man though his life was nearer to ending than beginning--his expression grave, and nodded. "Gabrielle's been taken." He saw Iolaus flinch and sighed softly. His old friend had always had a bit of crush on the girl, though he'd accepted that he would never be dear to her heart as anything but a friend. There'd been hurt in his eyes for years after her supposed death. "Xena thinks it was one of the gods. Apparently, Gabrielle disappeared from their camp, and her trail just evaporated into thin air."

"Who's left?" Iolaus questioned, sarcasm lacing his normally good-natured tones. He sat down, resting the crossbow he'd had aimed at Xena from the window on his lap. With all the insanity going on of late, it didn't pay to be careless and he wasn't up to the kind of hand to hand combat he'd once indulged in with ease.

"There are a few who could have done it," Hercules murmured thoughtfully. "I told her I'd look into it." He ran a hand through his hair. "But that's not all. She told me her version of what happened on Olympus. I don't know how much I believe of it. I get the feeling she left out some details...and she would have left out the fact that her dear little daughter is none other than Livia."

"You're kidding me, right?"

Hercules shook his head. "One and the same. I recognized her from the descriptions. Xena wasn't planning on giving me that little detail."

"Um, Herc, Ares...."

"And then there's that. She didn't even try to explain why he was there." Hercules didn't trust his half brother as far as he could throw...well...something a whole lot heavier than Ares.

"So where are you gonna look for her?"

The demi-god considered the question. "I'm not sure. I'll nose around. If one of the gods had something to do with it, I can't just walk away. I may not think much of what Xena's doing right now, but Gabrielle's an innocent. And, in any event, she wouldn't have left Xena willingly, so something will have to be done."

"Anything I can do to help?"

Hercules shook his head. "Not this time, my friend. I have to do this one alone."

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *~ *

Gabrielle was surprised by how easily her life settled into a routine in her new environs. For once she had time to write and she found it a cathartic exercise to put pen to paper and pour forth her thoughts and feelings. With space to explore her own emotions, it was eerie to realize how angry she was and just how long she'd been that way. And strangely freeing to finally admit it to herself.

When she wasn't writing, the temple seemed to have endless room and corridors to explore, a neverending supply of books and scrolls to read, food beyond her wildest dreams, and anything else she cared to ask for.

And when those things weren't enough, there was always the company of the Goddess of Love. Aphrodite came and went at will, but it seemed to the bard that she magically appeared whenever wanted or needed, teasing, flirting, teaching Gabrielle strange games from foreign lands, or catching the bard's hand in her own and taking her to the markets, meetings places, and vistas of some of the most exotic places in the world.

No mention was made of the kisses shared, guilty desires, or Xena. She simply played the much needed role of friend and confidante, giving the bard the time and space to heal at her own pace. Something Gabrielle had to admit to herself, she very much needed. She looked up from the scroll she was working on, images from past weeks playing in her mind's eye. And somewhere during that time her nightmares of Furies had turned to dreams of the goddess so heated and erotic that she routinely woke sweaty and gasping for air. And the excuse that it was just lust was fast losing any validity as she shared more time with the other woman and continued discovering how much she truly liked her. She was sweet, thoughtful, caring, with a surprisingly wicked sense of humor, and a knack for building the bard's ego whenever it started to dip too low.

Still staring distantly into space, Gabrielle silently chewed on a thumbnail as she let her thoughts wander unchecked. Her feelings were growing increasingly intense, while the guilt for "betraying" Xena was fading with every passing day. How could she betray someone who'd thrown her fears, emotions, and well-being out long before. She was still lost in thought when she heard the soft sound of paper rattling behind her.

The bard twisted in her chair, eyes going wide as they landed on the figure reclining on a couch a short distance away, a scroll held loosely in fine-boned hands. "Aphrodite," she gasped. Her eyes dropped to the scroll. "You...uh...you're reading...."

The goddess looked up, smiling a little blankly. "That's what scrolls are for, isn't it? To read?"

"Well...yeah...I just...I'm not used..." Gabrielle babbled uncertainly. "That is, I'm not used to having anyone read my work."

Aphrodite managed to frown, smile, and look sympathetic all at once. "But it should be read. This is really good." She rolled it back to the beginning, noting the title. "It's the Comic Tale of Meleagre's Defense of Potodeia."

A moment passed while Gabrielle considered several comments and quickly discarded them before finally asking, "Do you really like it?"

"Yes," the goddess assured her, then rose gracefully. "I'm not the goddess of arts or poetry, but I do know what I like and I enjoyed what I read."

Gabrielle blushed, suddenly tongue tied. "I-I didn't know you were there...reading." She nearly stumbled over her own tongue getting the words out.

Aphrodite smiled sweetly. "You were working so hard--very focused and concentrated--that I didn't want to bother you."

Sweet, sexy perfume teased the bard's nostrils as she goddess leaned close to offer her the rerolled scroll, her expression disappointed. "But if you don't want me to read it...."

"No, no," Gabrielle denied instantly. "I don't want you not to read it." She blinked as she realized she'd made absolutely no sense. "That is, you're welcome to read my scrolls. It just never occurred to me you'd want to." An image of Xena finally bothering to read what she'd written while in the Amazon camp flashed in her mind. It had taken years and even then she'd had to be bored out of her skull to show any interest.

"I'm not her," the goddess whispered as if she'd read Gabrielle's mind.

The bard blinked again, returning to the present. "No, you're not," she agreed, then offered a wan smile, still hurt by the remembered pain. "And I can't complain about that fact."

"I may not know much about writing," Aphrodite said softly. "But I really did enjoy it."

Gabrielle peered at the goddess thoughtfully, pushing aside her own pains and worries as something occurred to her. "Why do you always do that?"

Aphrodite frowned in confusion. "Do what?"

"Always refer to yourself as if you're foolish or stupid."

The goddess shrugged, doing her best surfer chick impression. "Hey, I'm the Goddess of Love and Beauty, not Wisdom and the Arts." It was an act that had fooled Gabrielle when they first met, but no longer made the grade. She'd seen too much of the woman's kindness and common sense since being under her protection.

"So love and beauty are foolish and stupid?" the bard asked pointedly, knowing full well the other woman felt quite the contrary.

Aphrodite flushed. "No, of course not. I just meant..." she snapped only to trail off without finishing. After a beat, she started again to give a glib answer. Under the bard's penetrating stare, the words didn't come and she snapped her mouth shut. She considered her response for a long moment before finally sighing softly, "You have to understand, my sister is--was--the Goddess of Wisdom--something she never let anyone forget. Athena had a knack for the one liner...the zinger that...well...it was just easier to get there first." She shrugged, looking away uncomfortably.

One of the things that had fascinated Gabrielle about the gods since first becoming aware that they were real, with personalities not so different from any mortal who had absolute power over life and death--which is to say mostly annoying--was how little difference there was between them and mortalkind. They could be cruel, kind, foolish, wise, arrogant, and now apparently possessed of inferiority complexes to rival the most uncertain of humans. "As you said, 'I'm not her.'"

The goddess shrugged a slender shoulder, a hint of a smile gracing her lips. "No," she agreed, "you're not. You're not like anyone I've ever known...god or mortal...."

They were standing close, staring into each other's eyes, but both uncertain what to say or do.

"Neither are you," Gabrielle admitted after a beat. "I'm used to Ares." Her lip curled with dislike. "And his nasty little games...or Artemis just not giving a damn." She shook her head as she remembered her initial daze in meeting the Goddess of Love. "You made me nuts at first...with that spell on Joxer and then that damn scroll that made everything I wrote happen...." Another head shake. "Except never quite the way I meant it to...."

Aphrodite shrugged, her expression embarrassed. "I was kind of annoying, wasn't I?" she admitted, though her lips quirked in a tiny grin. "But I didn't know what to make of you. You weren't awed or even very impressed." She grinned wickedly. "And you annoyed Ares...which I have to say I enjoyed." She fell silent for another long beat. "And I wanted to know you."

Gabrielle felt her heart slam into doubletime and she swallowed hard, unable to look away from the goddess' intense gaze. "I didn't know that."

Aphrodite reached out with a gentle hand, brushing silky bangs off the bard's brow. "The more I saw of you, the more you fascinated me." She looked away then, pulling her hand back as though she hadn't intended to reach out and touch, but had simply given way to impulse. "Ares saw it." Her expression blazed. "He tried to talk me into seducing you so he could turn Xena against you."

Gabrielle stiffened. The revelation didn't surprise her.

"When I told him she'd kill you, he laughed."

Which also didn't surprise the bard.

"I think that's what he wanted," Aphrodite admitted, shivering at the memory of her brother's plans. "He's obsessed with her...willing to do anything to have her...." She wrapped her arms tightly around herself as if to ward off the cold, staring off into the distance. "I was tempted," she exhaled without meaning to, then abruptly realized what she'd let slip and spun back, desperate to make Gabrielle understand. "I wouldn't have let you get hurt," she insisted, flinching in the face of the disapproval suddenly etched on the bard's features.

Gabrielle stepped back a pace, staring at the other woman as if she'd never seen her before. "Is that what this has all been about...seducing me--"

"No," Aphrodite insisted instantly. "I said I was tempted...but that has nothing to do with why you're here...at least not the way you're thinking. I just wanted to help." She pushed her hair back from her face. "Because I care about you."

Her confidence already shredded by Xena's ill treatment and Ares ongoing insults, Gabrielle suddenly didn't know what to believe or who to trust. She'd thought Aphrodite a friend--maybe even more than that-- but suddenly, she didn't know what to think. This opened the very real possibility that the goddess was merely using her. "Right...all the way to the bedroom?" she accused bitterly.

"If that were the case," the goddess responded with forced calm, her own temper rising, "we'd already be there." She knew her own appeal as well the art of sex and seduction. Few, if any, had ever resisted her charms when she chose to use them.

A muscle pulsed in Gabrielle's jaw, but she didn't deny the charge, just folded her arms across her chest, drawing into herself, her anger apparent.

"You know I'm right. If all I wanted was your body, I'd already have it." Perhaps it was part of the arrogance that came from godly powers, but a part of her needed Gabrielle to acknowledge that she hadn't taken advantage when it would have been so easy, especially since resisting that temptation had taken all of her self control--something she wasn't famous for in the first place.

The bard looked away. "Don't be so sure," she hissed, wanting to lash back in the face of her own hurt.

Anger rolling in her deep blue eyes, Aphrodite drew closer, reaching out to trail a finger along Gabrielle's slender shoulder. The bard pulled back, but the goddess only followed her, her movements sensuously graceful, her expression predatory as she made her point. "I am the Goddess of Love and Passion." She saw all the signs of unwanted arousal in Gabrielle's sea green eyes. "I could have you even now if that's all I wanted."

"Don't do this," the bard whispered through choking tears, suddenly hurting worse than she would have imagined possible.

Seeing that pain, Aphrodite yanked her hand back, dropping it to her side, ashamed of what she'd just done in anger. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she regained control. Her eyes slid aside, but she didn't back away. "You have to understand what it's like...being a god...the power." She reached out as if to touch Gabrielle, but pulled her hand back without making contact. "Over time, it's easy to forget there are limits. That something isn't necessarily right just because you want it. It's easy to slip into the habit of just taking--or destroying--whatever's in your way. Sooner or later, you always want something--or someone-- you have no right to. I wanted you-- I don't deny that-- and I was tempted...but I didn't do it."

"Why not?" Gabrielle whispered past the tightness in her throat. She didn't look up, but neither did she continue the accusations.

"Because I couldn't hurt you that way...and because I knew it wouldn't be real." Her eyes slid closed, her expression full of longing. "I want you, but not that way." She reached out, hooking a hand lightly behind Gabrielle's neck, achingly aware of the silky hair that dusted across the back of her hand. This time the bard didn't pull back. She swallowed hard before continuing. "And because you still loved her."

"And what if I still do?" Gabrielle whispered in a voice full of pain. All of this was reminding her of all the things she'd avoided thinking about since leaving her lover in the dead of night.

Aphrodite's eyes slid closed and her expression was almost as pained as the bard's. "You're not a prisoner here," she whispered intensely. "You can leave if you want...I just...I don't want...I don't want you to be hurt...and she's hurt you so much...." Deep blue eyes slid open staring into sea green. "After everything that's happened," she exhaled, "what do you feel?"

"I don't know ... anymore," the bard admitted, sounding lost even to her own ears.

"I understand." Aphrodite smoothed her hand along the width of Gabrielle's shoulder, moving to let off a little stress as she tried to explain, "I'm sorry for what I..." she couldn't finish the apology, and instead tried to explain, "I just wanted you to understand...I could take if I chose...and I haven't...I won't." She swallowed hard.

"Point made," Gabrielle whispered tightly, anger flaring anew in her eyes.

Aphrodite tucked a finger under the young mortal's chin, bringing her head up until their eyes met. "I didn't mean to hurt you. But maybe it's better you know everything. Haven't there been enough lies and half-truths?" She sighed guiltily when the bard didn't respond. "I'll leave you alone now...for as long as you want...all you have to do is call if you need me...I won't bother you otherwise." She stepped back, straightening her shoulders. "If you want me to take you somewhere after you've thought about it...I will." She swallowed hard as though the gesture cost her, but didn't retract it. "But I want you to know that I do genuinely care for you...and nothing would have made me hurt you intentionally." She waited a beat, clearly hoping for some kind of response. When it was clear none was to be forthcoming, she sighed softly and disappeared in a wave of glittering light.

Alone again, Gabrielle sank down onto the couch where Aphrodite had sat reading her scroll, trying not to notice the sweet perfume still lingering on the fabric as she dropped her face into her hands, massaging her temples in an effort to be rid of a sudden headache. She sighed exhaustedly. It was all so damn complicated.

The instant she'd heard the goddess' confession, she'd seen red, triggered by the sense of being out of control of the situation one more time. Xena had used her that way, tricked, manipulated, and ordered her around without saying why so many times that it just felt like it was happening again. Now, as she felt her temper start to cool so she could step back and look at the situation more calmly, she could see the other woman's point.

She hadn't used her power when she easily could have. Gabrielle knew from experience the kind of passion Cupid's arrows could trigger, so she could only guess at Aphrodite's powers should she put her mind and abilities to the test.

Considering the dreams she was already having, the bard was painfully certain she'd have fallen in a matter of minutes. She blushed at the thought, while her blood ran just a little hotter.

She couldn't escape the harsh reality that she wanted the other woman. Couldn't escape it and didn't really want to. Because it was more than just desire. Gabrielle had once thought that no one would or could ever make her feel the way Xena had in the beginning. She'd thought that amazing thrill and giddiness was something a person could only feel once in a lifetime. Now, she was starting to believe otherwise.

A twinge of guilt burned in her heart at the thought, but she couldn't deny it. She was starting to feel more than just physical desire or friendship for Aphrodite. The two were melding together into a third, deeper emotion that scared the hell out of her.

Gabrielle ran a hand through her hair, sighing softly. She needed to think about this. Figure out what to do. There needed to be ground rules if it was going to go anywhere. And she needed to decide if she did want it to go somewhere.

Because she was already well on the path, and she needed to decide whether to continue following it and just how far she wanted to go.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *~ *

"This is a bad idea," Ares grumbled as he peered past Xena's shoulder at the glade where several days before she had confronted Hercules and requested his help. The warrior princess ignored him as she continued watching with hawk eyes as an elderly Iolaus went about his daily chores. She had doubled back within hours of leaving the small farm and had watched every minute since, but she'd been too late to see Hercules leave. Either that, or he'd called in a favor and left by another more godly route. Either way, her failure to track him had Xena in a foul mood. And Ares continuing suggestions that they leave were doing nothing to improve it.

"Shut up," she hissed without looking back at him.

"Y'know," the former God of War sneered, "as much as I hate doing the annoying little blond any favors, hasn't it occurred to you that if Hercules figures out you haven't done as he told you, that he may just decide not to help." And he might just kick their asses for the hell of it. Xena might not mind that sort of thing, but Ares was realistic about his newly mortal body. A beating from his half brother was not something he cared to experience in view of the fact that simple saddle sores had him ready to swear to Eli's new god if he could make them better.

Xena glanced back this time. "He'll help...or he'll wish he had," she growled, fingering her chakram in a way that made Ares a little uneasy. Not that he had any problems with killing Hercules--the gods knew he'd tried and failed enough times--but Xena's bloodlust seemed to be expanding, and he was beginning to worry who it might grow to encompass, since as far as he could tell, the only one immune from her wrath was her increasingly personality free daughter. She continued to glare at him. "When did you turn into such a pansy?"

Ares stiffened, eyes gleaming with hate. To say the least, it wasn't the way he was used to having people treat him. He started to tell her off, then his eyes fell on the gleaming chakram in her hand. "Hey, you want to kill Hercules, it's not my problem."

"That's right," she jeered. "It's mine." Something in her expression chilled his blood, leaving Ares convinced that he'd be wise to get out of this little situation. And he would have right then and there, except he was getting very uneasy about her response should he try.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *~ *

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